One Week

Al and I are no more. I realized, after just a few days of our relationship, that he’s really not ready yet.

On the first Sunday of being “boyfriends,” I asked him for a movie date. It was Prince of Persia’s first Sunday and aside from the fact that I really wanted to see the movie, I knew he was also looking forward to watching it.

It was also his day off and I was kinda glad that everything was going the way I wanted it to – our first date as “us,” we’ll watch a movie that we both like, we’ll dine after watching, the time on our hands cuz it’s his day off.

But then I received a text a little before lunch that day. He wanted to bring CJ along. I wanted to ask why but I decided not to anymore. I knew it. He was not comfortable being around me in public anymore.

We used to go out a lot before we got into the relationship. He’d go with me to the vet when I’d take my shih-tzu for a check-up; he was just one text away when I wanted to eat out and didn’t wanna eat alone; he’d even immediately go to CJ’s when he’d find out I was there.

I realized that perhaps he was just as sweet before because we were just friends; because I was an older friend that he somehow looked up to as an older brother or an uncle, but not really as a lover.

Perhaps we both thought it’s something more than that, so we crossed the line towards a more intimate relationship. And then this happened.

I arrived ahead of them at the resto which was deserted that time of day. It would be usually packed during lunch and dinner time but it was 3 pm. Al and CJ arrived a few minutes after. CJ was all smiles and greeted me and stuff,  but Al couldn’t even look at me in the eye. He just kept on texting someone on his cellphone. I realized just then that it was the first time we met after we became “us” some 5 days ago. And he couldn’t even greet me a simple hi.

He seated across me at the table. CJ  seated beside him. We had halo-halo. And when the waiter brought our food, CJ transferred to the seat beside me. CJ would talk to me about random stuff, while Al wouldn’t even join in. I tried to get him into talking so many times but all he could do was nod or mumble a one-liner. He finally spoke up when we’re about to leave the resto. But he talked only to CJ.

It was fine with me, though. Actually, the minute he texted me he wanted to bring CJ along, I wanted to break up with him and not watch the movie anymore. But the movie date was all set and I really wanted to see it that I told myself to just go on with it. Besides, CJ is also my friend though he didn’t know that Al and I were on.

I sat between the two of them in the movie house. Al was still quiet. He would occasionally laugh and make “oh” and “ah” reactions on scenes but he really wouldn’t talk to me. I tried asking who he’s texting with because he hadn’t stopped texting even while watching the movie, but he wouldn’t answer.

Although sad that Al brought a chaperone to our date, I was glad that CJ was there to actually make me feel that I had company.

It was a date I couldn’t wait to end. Although I enjoyed the movie much, I really felt so awkward that my so-called boyfriend was treating me as if I wasn’t there.

I spent that Sunday night trying so hard to keep myself from texting him angry messages. And he actually had not texted me anything aside from a single “Good night!” which I did not replied to.

I broke up with him the following day, told him that we really should go back to just being friends. He didn’t want to at first, saying that all he needed was time to get used to “it.” He also said sorry that he wasn’t able to equal the love that I was giving him.

But of the 7 days that we were boyfriends, I missed my being single – actually, being single and carefree. I hated the fact that I was again waiting for someone’s text, and being paranoid everytime he would text late. I hated the fact that I needed to match my schedule with someone else before I could even watch a movie. And I’m sure the list would go longer had our relationship lasted longer.

Perhaps I, myself, wasn’t ready for a teenage boyfriend. Being single for so long made it quite impossible for me to bear his indifference and to wait for him to “adjust” to the situation.

I love Al. I know he loves me, too. But I guess being boyfriends wouldn’t do for now. Perhaps later, when he’s more matured, and quite know what a homosexual relationship is really all about.

We’re good friends now, though. Especially after he has broken up with his girlfriend. But that doesn’t mean he’s single now. After a week of breaking up with Mae, Al is now back in his ex-gf’s arms. Someone named Angie. Already met her before I even had a crush on him.